I’m not going to lie, I was hesitant about tuning into this new project but listen, just in this second episode these ladies turned bosses are dropping gems.
It was the moment I heard Karen Civil say to Ming Lee with a straight face, “I’m not fixing nothing that I ain’t break,” that I fell face first in love with their new podcast ‘Girl I Guess’ featured on Joe Budden TV’s YouTube Channel.
In their second episode they go over the craze of Club House and how Civil is finding ways to capitalize off the moment, the buzz, and the ease of sharing information. They also explored being your authentic self, gaining equity, supporting friends and prioritizing yourself while reflecting on moments of growth throughout their careers and being at Michelle Obama's party.
Photo courtesy of Joe Budden via YT January 28, 2021
I’m still at work, with my headphones plugged into my ear when I hear their conversation move from CH to friendships and then Civil said that about broken ties and I felt it so much I had to double back and rewind it about a half an hour in.
Civil segued into the harsh reality that people tend to have a difficult time accepting the reality of your success. She said for those who don’t know Lee and her grind their process seems to be that maybe because they aren’t able to channel their energy into themselves and their hustle in the fashion that she was that she somehow cheated her way into success with the use of “drug money,” and that she had to trade her cars in for the new car that she posted to her socials. To that Lee says, in a relationship I pushed a G Wagon and Range Rover, single I’m in a Lambo and Maybach--she talked herself up to being the table, chairs, drive, entrée’ saying that she is the force and nothing or no one is in her back about what she wants to accomplish except for her and--it’s the confidence for me.
“If you take all that energy, that you’re using to tear down somebody and you put it towards yourself, trust me, it’s gonna come back,” Lee added.
This part perked me up because this is a lesson that I’m learning to lean into in this season. You have to be so solid in your own vision, abilities, and talents that what others support do not matter, what others choose to add helps, but your foundation can not be torn down by any external forces.
At this point, Civil piggy backed into a reflection of her own where she realized, others are just not satisfied with the fact that you found success. She spoke on her move to California and how once in the industry, she would extend olive branches and essentially try to break bread with others and they couldn’t see past the fact that they just did not want her to have the level of success that she worked for, crazy right? Reminded myself constantly, this is the year of realization, not surprise!
“I’m gonna [take and] put that energy into [effing] with people into that [solid] eight people [previously saying how she used to focus on the two people out of ten that didn’t like her]. Now I’m at a point where I don’t want to fix nothing, I ain’t break,” said Civil.
Nah, when Civil clicked her fingers together in a yoga and meditate type of motion with her eyes closed like she was trying to channel her center and said, “namaste,” I lost it. Referring to the notion that the real tea is that not every time you’re putting out good will you receive it back in that manner. And basically, not everyone honors just being good because it’s right.
The gems that these moguls touched on this episode, towards the end of the 60 minute episode, Civil highlights how Lee is 100% supportive and doesn’t seem to have a jealous bone in her body. They were talking about the ending of an 11-year friendship and Lee explained it best saying, “I think about--if this is one thing I found out about, what’s all the other [ish] I didn’t find out about. Once you figure out who somebody is, that’s them. When you come to my house with the wig, nose, shoes, and tricycle, I can’t be mad when you’re blowing up balloons in my living room, you’re a clown.”
“You got one time to fuck me over and I guarantee you, the opportunity will never present itself,” says Lee.
In just that hour I walked away with new insight on the new resolution that I'm coming to which is how to handle myself like the priority and ultimately a boss in all my relationships, even with myself. I've learned that what you won't even tolerate from you becomes the real standard and attitude. And it’s not easy to win me over, in the least bit, but when I research these women and what they’ve been able to accomplish, I see adding these gems to my Telfy sack, worthy.
To the point that Civil makes who is thee female media mogul and social strategic powerhouse, I can not go back to being the girl who spins the block for the bs. And boy was I on the treadmill for folks who could care less. My energy was completely spent. In the past, I’ve never been the one to seize my power back from situations that no longer serve me or punish people for mistreating me and unfortunate for them, this ish actually feels good. I may have not been confident about where I stood in other people's eyes in relation to who I was to them but, I know what I was giving out and I believe that I could use it and appreciate it a 1000% more. And Lee is onto something, what’s a lost one if I am the force, whole spread, table, chairs, the silverware, napkins, the juice, pillows, building, décor, snack, entrée’, desert?
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